Didn't See This Coming

Here are some stories that I have come across this week. I know I have not been on here in a while so here we go..Not so crazy but newsworthy to say the least. I have also linked my stories so that you can click on them

1. Nita Reed from Bring It On dies from hit and run accident

2. Hurricane Sandy Death toll hits 65

3. Freeway Killer on the loose again

4. Man etches his wifes vajajay on her tombstone

5. Man lived in hotels for 20 years using stolen credit cards

6.Lawrence Wilkerson says GOP is full of racist

7. Shooting at Creflo Dollar megachurch, one person killed

8. The top 8 beloved countries in the world, and the U.S. is not in the top 8.

9. Sandy headed to east coast, many are evacuating.

10. Woman set fire during C-section loses suit against doctor

Not Broke Enough?

I know we all probably know someone who has been affected by the changes in the economy and I am no different, except for that someone is me. These last two years of my life have been a roller coaster to say the least. I went from middle class corporate america to lower class in the matter of minutes. I also went from a family of 2 to a family of 3 right before I was downsized by a huge corporation, who will remain nameless, but they have a worlwide presence.

Anyhow during this time I collect unemployment and I have been looking for a job. It is not easy but I am determined to find something before my unemployment runs out. I not only lost my job but all my health benefits that came along with it. This was very crucial to me because I have type 1 diabetes. I was fortunate enough to get medicaid from the state, until the state started making cuts. I lost my medicaid because I exceeded the income guidelines for a family of 3 by $28.00. I was shocked and upset by this. I can't live with out my insulin and I felt the state was telling me that my life was not worth more than $28.00

Thank God, I got past that and the insulin manufacturer has a program thru my doctor's office that made it affordable for me. I am so grateful for that. I was scared and worried the whole time trying to figure out how I was going to afford my medicine and take care of my kids on unemployment.

Along with all that my youngest son was born with hearing loss, thankfully he is still able to be covered by medicaid. But I thought since he had hearing loss, he could get disability benefits. I applied and was told I made too much "unearned" income. If I made the same amount with a job my son would qualify. I never knew there was a difference between earned and unearned income. I still pay taxes on my unemploymemt. Its crazy how these agencies look at the source of income instead of the need.

I have been trying to get help for me and my family through all these agencies and I keep hearing the same thing, my income it too high. It is unemployment!! Its temporary its not an on going thing. I had to be out of work to get it. So I was thinking, wow how broke do I have to be to get help.

You either have to have very little income or more kids to get help. Now I kind of understand why some people who are in the system do the things they do. They say all this aid is supposed to be temporary, but for people who are in temporary situations like myself, it doesn't appear to be true.

Gas prices are ridiculous, food prices are up, everything is going up. I have to provide for me and my family. It has not been easy but I thank God, I am making it. But this experience has shown me why the welfare system, and other agencies have the issues that they do. Don't get me wrong some people actually need it. But where is the motivation to get off the system if its so easy to get help, when you are very poor. I am not saying to not help them, but the poor has changed over these last few years. The poor is not who you think they are and not who they used to be. I am right on the bubble and suffering from consequences I did not cause. My unemploymemt is too high to get assistance but not enough to change the quality of life for me and my kids. I guess this is the new middle class...

Didn't See This Coming..

All I can say is WOW! Some of these stories this week just shows that there are alot of sick and crazy people in this world. Well here go the stories from this week some were shockers and just plain crazy.

1. Man not sorry for kiling HIV postitive mistress

2. Mom sues Walmart after she says employees ripped up her money

3. UK media in uproar over Kate Middleton's topless pics

4. Aspiring rapper tweets YOLO about driving drunk dies minutes later

5. Missing woman found alive in freezer

6. Naked & bloody man gnaws on woman's head

7. Woman finds ex-boyfriend living in her attic over 12 years after break up

8. 92 year old man tries to kill his daughter-3 times

9. Wisconsin dad sets fire to kill family

10. Pediatrician arrested for child porn

Does He Really Love You?

I know we all have had that one guy we were crazy about, we were crazy in love and thought we were losing our minds at the same time. He was a great guy but we just couldn't figure him out. One minute he was sweet and caring and the next minute he was gone. All the while we are behind trying to figure out what happened. Then he comes back he must love you, right? Maybe who knows but there is nothing more frustrating then not knowing how a person feels about you when you are totally feeling them. I participated in a webinar the other day that wanted to help women know if a man really loved them or not, even though I am not in a relationship at this time I want to be prepared lol. Anyhow, the relationship expert is a man and who better to know a man. He said there were 7 questions to ask yourself to figure out if your man loves you or is using you. You can go through the questions and give yourself a point for each yes. Okay here we go.

1. Does he say "I love you"? Seems obvious but this is a good indicator. Also keep in mind even if he does not actually say it all the time, is he showing it in his actions. Do you feel that he loves you?

2. Does he make you A priority in his life? You should at least be in his top 3 priorities, he will always have work, kids & family. Here are somethings he might do for you if you are important to him. Attend a function he hates, because of you. He gives you occassionl gifts and if he loves you he will make you #1 sometimes.

3.Does he tells his friends about you & show you off? Have you met his best friends and family? A man who is in love wants to show his woman off.

4.Does he care about your pleasure during sex? Is he 100% focused on himself? Does he ever open his eyes while your making love? Just some things to think about, but you should know if a man is wanting to please you.

5.Does he respect & encourage you? Does he value your opinion? Does he treats you like a partner? Does he encourage you to have friends and interest outside the relationship? (note: Jealousy is NOT love)

6.Do your friends like the way he treats you? Friends are often better judges of a man than you are. Ask you close male friends and male relatives about your man, they will let you know about him as well.

7. Does he looks at you like he will do whatever to get in your pants? Does he check you out? The visual is very important to men and if he is not looking, longing for you he is probably not physically attracted to you anymore.

Ok hopefully you added up all your points

If you score is:

7..he is good at showing it

5-6....he loves you so just focus on the good

3-4...mostly meaning that something is there it is just not that deep

1-2...he is a jerk and run, he is using you or he resents you

NOTE: You should not answer these questions unless your are beyond the dating stage and he is your boyfriend

Didn't See This Coming..

Here are some stories I found interesting and noteworthy this week, hopefully you will too.

1. Michael Clark Duncan dies

2. Drew Peterson found guility of 1st degree murder of his 3rd wife

3. Chad Ochocinco tattoos his wife's face on his leg

4. Father watches as neighbor ties up his son and let his dog attack him

5. Chinese river turns red

6. Angry ex-girlfriend triggered US Airways bomb hoax

7. Ohio teen travels quarter of a mile through sewer

8. State Farm faces criminal investigation over hurricane claims

9. N.J. casino sues gamblers who won big on unshuffled decks

10. Good Samaritans stop the crime, but mistake victim for mugger

Didn't See This Coming

Here are some stories that I came across this week, as always some are sad, crazy and just weird.

1. Togo women push sex strike to unseat president

2. Former Gov. Sanford engaged to Argentine mistress

3. Sherman Hemsley is still not buried family dispute over money

4. 10 year old Maine girl charged in infant's death

5. New Orleans hit by hurricane Isaac

6. Man sues male enhancement drug company for disgusting side effects(very disgusting, ugh!!)

7. DJ stalked men & broke in their homes & performed oral sex on them while they were sleeping

8. 2 guys arrested on drug charges were trying to shoot up heroin while parked outside police station

9. Shooting at supermarket in New Jersey

10.Perry Hall High School shooting

Didn't See This Coming..

Here are some of this week's stories that caught my eye this week. This world never disappoints. I'm always afraid that I will not have any stories to share but as long as people are sick, crazy and weird, I will be okay :)

1. Top Gun director Tony Scott leap to death from bridge

2. Red Lobster employee attacked for good service

3. Romney predicted to win election

4. Girl forced to marry her rapist kills herself

5. Parents sue after son forced to bathe at school

6. 7 year old attempts suicide twice after bully forces him to perform oral sex on school bus

7. N.J. mom who once lost custody decapitates 2 year old son

8. Rapper LL Cool J nabs intruder at home

9. Book on Bin Laden raid coming out Sept 11th

10.Empire state building shooting

Obsession: U got it bad

Have you ever listened to this song by Usher and thought to yourself, man he had it bad and you could never see yourself so hung up over somebody. Well I think we all have been here at least once in our lives. You are obessed with someone. You think about them all the time, they are always in your head. Everything reminds you of them. Every, tv show, song on the radio, what you eat for lunch, you just can't help it. You start trying to understand why this person is always on your mind. Sometimes people will confuse their obsession or longing for love, when in reality that is all it is. Most times we obsess over people we can't have or are not sure about, because if they were around more you wouldn't have to think about them so much.

I do not think there is nothing wrong with this. It only becomes a problem when you can't control your emotions behind the obsession. Once you lose control you start doing crazy things, like texting and calling all the time, stalking their facebook page, or just happen to be where they are just to see what's going. I will never understand how people think but we all know the more you try to pursue someone the more they resist and start to think you are crazy and you never fulfill your desire which is to be with that person.

The best option is to step back and give it some space and take this time to evaluate yourself and understand why you are obsessing over this person. This behavior is unhealthy. While you believe that convincing someone to be with you they would want you more but it does not work like that. Just think about people who pursued you that you were not interested in. No matter how hard they tried or what they did, you did not change your mind. The same is here for the person you have this obsession for. I know that giving space and waiting is hard but get busy while you wait and either the person will come back to you or if they don't, your obsession will lessen over time.

Didn't See This Coming...

I missed last week so here are stories for both weeks. All crazy, unbelieveable, and wierd.

1. Shooting at temple in Wisconsin

2. Two 13 year old boys steal car and drive from Ohio to Missouri

3. Randy Travis arrested for drunk driving and he was naked

4. Man becomes texting champion wins $50,000

5. Man kept girlfriend in padlocked room

6. Hearse driver dies while taking body to funeral

7. Woman has been using eye drops to poison boyfriend for years because she wanted attention from him

8. Man accidentally calls 911 during drug deal

10. Chinese boy gets head stuck in stone guardrail

Teen Pregnancy: It's all about the Green

I rememeber when I was growing up and teen pregnancy started to rise. It was looked at the most shameful thing to happen in a young girl's life. It was so much of a problem that people and agencies everywhere were trying to see how to stop it, abstinence and safe sex were being promoted. But what I noticed was that the media was emphasizing how bad teen pregnancy was in the minority community mostly in the black community. There were all kinds of statistics showing how fast black teen mothers were having babies and so on. Teen pregnancy is still a problem. But my problem is how it seems to be glamorized now since people can make money from it. The media only wants to show the majority or white people dealing with teen pregnancy. There are reality shows on TV dedicated to it. MTV has teen mom and now TLC has a show called High School Mom. I admit I did watch a few episodes of teen mom, but I stop watching when there were not any blacks or minorities on the show, especially when I found out each girl made around $50,000 to be on the show. I thought to myself if majority of the teen mothers are minorities why aren't they being represented on any of these shows. Why can't a black/minority teen mom who is trying to get back on track benefit from the money and fame that may come with doing the show? It appears that its okay to show the majority dealing with teen pregnancy when they can get paid from it. How can they deter teen pregnancy if these reality teen moms are becoming celebrities overnight sending the wrong message: become a mom and get a show.

I hate to make it about race , but when they want to show the negative aspects of teen pregnancy the focus is on the minority races. Giving the impression that only minorities have this problem but how can that be so when on these shows the majority is being represented as teen moms. It makes me question all the previous information I heard and the statistics about teen pregnancy in the U.S. It would reason based on what is represented on TV that more teen moms are white than any other race.

In my opinion these shows should be cancelled because they are not socialably responsible, they may show some of the consequences of being a teen mom but they are not effective in detering teen pregnancy, and it's obvious because these shows are still on. But I guess when it comes to teen pregnancy being shown on TV the only color that matters is green.

Men vs. Boys

As a single woman I thought I was being very selective in my choices, but what I realize is that I wasn't and I was dating grown boys instead of men. Now I am more experienced and my standards have changed and I know the difference between dating a boy and dating a man. Now it makes sense why none of my past relationships worked out. These boys were not mature enough for what I wanted and were not capable of making it happen. So ladies just in case you are not sure, I want to share some things that I noticed are different between dating boys and dating men.

Boys- Always talk about, or want sex and are in a rush to have sex with you. They are always trying to get into your pants

Men- Will take their time to get to know you and make sure you are right for them before they have sex with you and they will respect your choice to wait as well

Boys- Blame everyone else for their current situation. Everything is every one else's fault, the man, their momma, their baby momma, their cousin, who ever they can blame besides themselves

Men-Don't constantly complain about their current situation. They take responsibility for their actions and they always have a plan in place to change whatever they do not like

Boys-Are always talking about what they want to do in their life or chasing a dream that has not happened yet.

Men-Can talk about their accomplishments and things they have already done. They have realistic and attainable goals.

Boys-Are irresponsible they can't keep a job, don't want to work or take care of their kids. Some won't even take care of themselves they are wanting a woman to do it for them.

Men-Are very responsible, hard workers, always making sure his and your needs are met.

Boys-Are usually players and are not looking for a commitment just a long term booty call or friends with benefits

Men-Are not afraid of commitment or marriage, most of them want it just as much as women do

These are just a few things and I am quite sure there are alot more but this should give you somethings to think about. Please feel free to comment if you can think of any others. Thanks.

Ignorance is Ingnorance even if its only hair...

History was made in the 2012 Olympics, Gabby Douglas became the first African American to win the gold medal in the all around for gymnastics. I am very happy that she won but I am saddened and upset with the ignorance I am seeing online. I usually do not play into ignorance but it saddens me when it is coming from our own race. This young lady made history and now her accomplishment is being over shadowed by comments about her hair. It is obvious because I am seeing it every where online and I felt compelled to write about. So who ever the "hater" is who started this you are getting what you wanted. This shows some of the mentality of the black community and why we can not move forward. I don't think that only a certain group of people are ignorant, I believe that ignorance is found in every race, nationality, etc. But as black people we have to deal with enough from other races why would we pour salt onto one another. I will never understand it but I guess that is human nature in the form of jealousy. There really wasn't anything else they could say so they decide to pick on what they could and everyone ran with it. Congrats Gabby and please don't let the nay-sayers steal your glory.

Didn't See This Coming..

Here are some stories I came across this week, some are interesting, exciting and just plain strange and stupid.

1. Motel 6 TV displays racist slur.

2. Olympians are sending racist tweets.

3. The Jacksons are feuding.

4. Girlfriend misses jumbo screen proposal.

5. Dennis Rodman writes a childrens book.

6. Hepatitis C "serial infector" could have spread disease to 100s in hospital.

7. Blackout 620 million people are in the dark.

8. Man shoots fireworks out of his butt.

9. Gabby Douglas makes history at the Olympics.

10. Lawn chair ballonist fly over Oregon.

Didn't See This Coming...

This crazy world doesn't disappoint again. Here are some stories that were shocking, news worthy and crazy to me.

1. Sherman Hemsley (George Jefferson) dies.

2. Police rescue blow up doll.

3. Mariah Carey joins american idol.

4. Man who looks like santa told to leave Disney World.

5. Woman accidently bakes 15K left in oven.

6. Woman fired because she smells like cigarette smoke.

7. 83 year old man arrested for prostitution.

8. 2 people arrested after accidently texting cops about drug deal.

9. LGTB community bans chick-fil-a ( and one of the VP's of chick-fil-a dies suddenly, hmm)

10. Man steals puppy by putting it in his pants (he has not been caught)

My New Addiction

Sometimes we do things out of habit so we think until we realize we do it all the time and it becomes an addiction. I hate to admit it but my new addiction is the Investigation discovery (ID) channel. This is interesting and kind of scary at the same time. This channel is basically about all types of crimes mainly murder. I like who the bleep did I marry, the new show dates from hell, wicked attraction and just about every other show on that channel. I starting thinking does that make me a twisted person that I enjoy watching shows with dangerous content. I know that I could never commit any of the crimes I have seen on this channel. Most times they are very gruesome. But, then I thought I can't be the only one who is addicted to this wicked stuff, after all there is a whole channel dedicated to it, letting me know there are plenty of other addicts out there just like me. I guess I like to watch because I just can't believe some of the crimes people commit and why they commit them. But, it also shows me that there really are some sick people out in this world. But, we all like to watch it, why? I will never know but I do sometimes get a rush, is that bad? I realized I was addicted when I stayed up late night watching show after show and didn't even get tired. I guess I would rather be the person watching the show versus being a person on the show. Does anyone else like that channel? What is your favorite show? Come on, you can tell me :)...I'll check my blog in between commercials lol!

Didn't See This Coming...

This weeks interesting, strange and crazy stories. Please feel free to add any others.

1. Movie shooting in Colorado

2. Boy Scouts oust lesbian den mother. I think I will write about this soon

3. Americans on no-fly list allowed to learn to fly.

4. Mother beats 4 yr old to death for bed wetting.

5. Postal service set to be default 1st time on $5 bil payment.

6. Man pays off mortgage with 800lbs of pennies.

7. Mother puts beer in 2 year old sippy cup.

8. 3 L.A. homeless people found stabbed with note.

9. Lettuce pic gets 3 BK workers fired.

10.Woman poses as boy, tricked (under age) girl into sex.

10 Things Women find UNattractive in Men

I came across this blog stating 10 things men find unattractive in women and most of them dealt with the physical aspect of women. Which I am not surprise since men are very visual. I decided to come up with my on list (no particular order) based on my dislikes and complaints I hear from other women. I am quite sure if you were to ask any woman this list would be quite longer, but I don't have that type of time lol! Please feel free to use the comments section to add to the list. Thanks

1. Liar This trait explains itself. No one likes a liar that shows that you are not trustworthy which will hurt the foundation of the relationshp. Women respect honesty even if it hurts.

2. Entitlement Most men feel that if they do something nice or spend money that a woman is supposed to have sex with him. Not so. We know that's what men want but if we feel you are not trying to pursue anything more than sex that is a big turn off.

3. Keeping his word We all have a had one or two guys who said those four words of false hope "I'm gonna call you". We women wait and it never happens. Fellas if we can't trust you to keep your word about the small things how much weight are we going to put into anything you tell us.

4. Insecure There is nothing more unattractive then an insecure man. Always up under you and when he is not around you, he calls and texts you all the time. But the huge one is he is always accusing you of being with other men.

5.Financial Instability. Not all women are gold diggers. But when a man is providing for himself it gives a woman a sense of security. It is good to know that if you need a little financial help from time to time you can turn to your man and he got you "boo".

6. The Playa. No one wants to feel like their emotions are being played with. Fellas be real if you are not ready to settle and you want to see what else is out there. You maybe surprised how that can work in your favor because some women like a challenge and will try change your playa ways

7. Baby Momma Drama It is hard to find a man nowadays with out kids, but no woman wants to have to deal with baby momma drama. As a man you need to get that drama under control. Having drama either means you are not taking care of your children or there is some unfinished business between you and baby momma. Either way clean it up!!!

8. Lack of Style. Fellas keep your stuff tight. Not saying women are superficial but no one likes an unkept man. If you have dreads make sure they are not matted, keep your appointmens at the barbershop. You should also make sure your clothes are clean and age appropriate. There is nothing more unattractive then a 50 year old man dressed like Lil Wayne.

9. The Dreamer I admire a man who has dreams and aspirations, but if you have been pursuing your dream for over 10 years and it has not happen, its probably time to let that dream go. I know people say you should never give up on your dreams but you should also be real. Everyone is not going to be a rapper or entertainer; get a job like the regular folk and make some money.

10. Commitment Phobe This is the biggest gripe women have with men. I can't totally blame the man, but I will lol!. Men you know right away if a woman is wife, girlfriend or benefit material, but you keep that to yourself. Most men will not tell a woman where she stands because she will more than likely stop having sex with him. Men can and will date for years. Anyhow, men let us know where we stand it will make everyting better for everyone. But that would be to much like right.

Didn't See this Coming...

This week's surprising, shocking or outrageous stories. You can search any of these online to read more about them. Don't forget to share any crazy stories you have read in the comments section. Thanks.

1. 29 Alleged cannibals arrested

2. Steven Tyler and J. Lo leave idol

3. Drug tunnel discovered

4. Woman loses 98lbs by having excessive sex

5. Romney booed at NAACP event

6. Target will not sell Frank Ocean's CD

7. Michelle Obama's death threat

8. Man kills 3 daughters and tucks them in bed

9. Woman has size 102ZZZ breasts

10. $185,000K Dog wedding

Can you be too honest in a relationship?

You meet someone new and things are going great and just when you think it is going to get better..your ex calls you. The ex is on a mission to either try to get you back or to hook up. You let your ex know that you are not interested but you dont tell them about your new boo because you guys arent official yet. But, my question is do you tell the new boo that your ex contacted you? If you do how much information do you share? Will you just say it in passing and brush it off as if he didnt want anything or do you tell your new boo your ex was trying to get in those jeans? That is a tough question to answer. I believe you should be open and honest about everything if you want a good relationship. But is there such a thing as being too honest? I know people always want the truth but most times they can't handle it. I am quite sure most women would keep it to themselves, but if your new man's ex was calling him, you know you would want to know. And you would rather he tell you then you find out later on that there was still some communication going on between them. If it comes out and he didnt tell you, you will start to question the whole relationship by wondering what else is he keeping from you. I am not sure how this works from a man's perspective, alot of it will depend on the man. So, I guess there is no straight yes or no answer, you will have to judge your situation for yourself. What do you think? Please share your comments or stories. Thanks.

Didnt See This Coming.....

There is so much going on in this crazy world that I cant keep it all straight. I have been shocked and surprised by some of the stories I have seen and I cant write about all of them, so I just decided to start a new post on Fridays called "Didn't See This Coming.." About all the crazy, strange and shocking news to me. I will choose ten ( no particulare order) each week..some of them may not of matter to you but these were things that made me say...huh? what? really?...

1. Anderson Cooper admits he is gay

2. Tom and Katy are getting a divorce

3. George Zimmerman is out on bail (again)

4. Evelyn and Chad Ocho Cinco get married

5. Miliatry men become U.S. citizens--didn't know you could join the U.S. army and NOT be a citizen

6. Katy Perry has a movie coming out about her life (see what the beib started lol!)

7. People are still eating bath salts

8. A mother from SC was charged by her city to clean up the blood from her son's murder

9. Cop dies during 3 way sex, widow wins $3M (google it)

10.Lifeguard fired for saving a man's life...it was in an area that they do not patrol..ok so let him drown...really??? Please share any of your crazy, strange and shocking news.....Thanks

Obama...Care?

I didn't undertand all the hoopla when this option for health insurance was first being presented. At the time I was working full time and had benefits, so I really wasn't concerned because I knew my insurance was not going to change. A lot of people were upset because they felt the government was getting involved and shouldn't tell people what they should do. Well since this has started, I lost my job and I am now on the other side of the spectrum and have a better understanding of how health insurance in this country really works. I never really thought about health or life insurance until I lost my job and realized I am completely responsible for everything concerning me and my children. I wasn't sure how I was going to afford my insulin and my supplies for my insulin pump. Fortunately, I was able to be covered with the state insurance or medicaid. I guess because I have dependents. It is not the best insurance but it allowed me to receive the medicaions I needed to live. I never knew what the term under insured meant until I was on medicaid. The care is the very minimial and most specialist do not accept state aid. I had to change my son's dentist, our eye doctor, my brand of insulin and so on. But, I guess its better than no insurance, which is where I will be in 5 days. The governor of my lovely state IL, signed a bill that will cut medical benefits for over 20,000 people in the state. I got a two weeks notice that this will be happening (thanks for the heads up). I am not sure what I am going to do besides look at other options and pray. My whole basis is that the main complaint with Obama care was government involvement on decisions. But the government is making decisions all the time that we the people suffer from. My governor was concerned with making cuts because the budget is screwed up. I don't understand why they would cut something so detrimental to people lives. I didn't have any say in this and I am just supposed to accept it and try to live with it. I can't live with out insulin, but I guess that doesn't matter to my governor or government.

Is snitching a bad thing?

There was murder in the city across the river from us. This was their first homocide since 2007. It is a small community with little diversity but it's economic growth is running circles around our city that is 5 times larger. Anyhow the shooting happened and a day later they already knew who the suspects were and everyone is on the hunt. I was thinking wow; how can that small police force get their suspects so fast and our city that has has about 6 or 7 homocides already this year takes weeks or sometimes even months to get a suspect? I know that their police force is not better than ours. I started thinking maybe because the town is smaller and everybody knows everybody. Then I thought well, the city is majority white so there is urgency in the matter versus when a black man is killed. I am not trying to make it all about race but I do beleive race plays an issue in it but not for the reason you may think. I started thinking about that question and how fast things were getting solved. What was the difference? Why was it so fast and who made it so? My conclusion is that it is the community that is making the difference. In the Black commumity people are scared to speak against crime. They dont want to be labeled as a snitch because of the fear or retaliation. I understand that to a point no one wants trouble or to live in fear. But, think about what would happen if more Black people would speak up. I am not saying it would end the violence but it may help to deter it. It is sad the huge affect fear has on our community. You have the fear of the violence that occurs everyday and the fear of speaking up against it. I know how most people feel. How can our community expect to combat violence if no one speaks up? I guess you got weigh the lesser of the two evils and most people won't encourage others to speak up until it hits home. I see it all the time. As soon as their relative is killed they are on tv pleading for people to come forward and tell the police what they know. It takes a lot of courage to speak up for what is right. I know at the time you may think is it worth speaking up. That is a choice you will have to make. But, look back at what happened when people started to look the other way at crimes committed in our community. Long ago Black people stuck together and fought together there was a since of pride and loyalty among our race. That feeling is gone and has been replaced with a selfish mentality that has caused division amoung our race. No one thinks about the big picture and looks at the future benefits. I know you cant see the benefit in speaking up "snitching" at this time, but one immediate benefit is getting criminals off the street in hopes of making our communities safe.

Easy girls make it hard

I was watching Dr. Drew Life changers the other day and he had Steve Ward the match maker on his show. The show was about the modern day college dating experiece or lack of. One thing Steve said that is so true is that the easy girls are making it hard for the good girls who are trying to date and have relationships. That is so true but it not only happens in college it is going on in the dating world today. A lot of people want instant gratification they will not take the time to get to know someone and will just "hook up" with random people. As a single woman beyond her college years I see this all the time. I see that men today are very lazy when it comes to dating, most men will not do it because most women do not require it. It is very sad and it makes it hard for women like me who believe in "old fashion" values; men pursuing women, and women not being so easy to get. I know social media and online dating plays a big part in that. The number of people available to someone is endless and there is no effort to get to know someone. You just look at a picture and profile and go from there. There was a young lady on the show who said that it shouldn't be a problem if a woman wants to "hook up" with whomever she chooses and move on to the next. She then said "men do it all the time". Yes they do but we all know that is a double standard. Steve did a poll of the men and asked them if a woman had 5 partners or 50 partners who would they value more, of course they said the one with 5 partners. I believe the only way men will stop being lazy is if more women would raise their standards and require them to work for what they want. A lot of women beleive that giving it up will keep a man interested. Yeah for a little while. Anyhow we all know how that story goes. But I get frustrated sometimes when I mention to a men about going out on a date, he comes up with all sorts of excuses or whatever and you would think I asked him for a million dollars. I haven't given up though. I am going to keep my standards and goals in mind and trust and believe that some man out there will think I am worth the effort :)

Obama, you are making this hard for me

Recently Obama stated that same sex couples should be allowed to be married. I was in disbelief and I am still trying to digest his comment. First, let me say I do not hate anyone but I do not agree with the homosexual lifestyle. I am a christian and it goes against everything I believe in. As I receive emails from Obama's campaign asking for donations, I find myself struggling to support him. I am struggling between my political views and religious beliefs. What happened to the separation of church and state? I have never experienced this type of conflict as a registered voter. Now I am not sure. Well I am kind of sure but doing what I know is right is disappointing. Obviously I will follow God before Obama, but I feel obligated to vote for someone. As an African American people have died, marched and fought so I can have this right. But, Jesus died for me too. See where I am going with this? I really don't want Romney for president but how can I support a president who is for something I don't believe in. I am thinking of bowing out of this election, better yet I'll just pray about it. Please share you thoughts?

.Welcome Back!

I have not been on here in awhile and there has been so much going on in this crazy land called the United States. From the Trayvon Martin case, Obama approving of gay marriage and just stupid news ...parents put toddler in washing machine. This just proves that no matter what life goes on and there will always be something to write about. So I an welcoming myself back and will re-start keeping up with my blog. There is too much nonsense in this world for me to blog about and I will make sure it will feed you mind.. stay tune and thanks for following....