Why the Need to Come out the Closet?

I just read an article about a 14 year old boy who committed suicide because he was being bullied at school for being bisexual and having all female friends. I do not condone that behavior bullying is wrong no matter what and it is so sad that young people are taking their lives because of it. But in response to his suicide a celebrity, Zachary Quinto, came out of the closet and admitted he was gay. My position is not to argue rather your are born gay or choose to be gay. I am baffled of why, gays, lesbians etc. feel the need to share with the public what they do in private? I am a heterosexual female and I do not tell anyone what I do behind close doors and I believe as long as your are an adult and everyone consents its nobody business what goes on in your bedroom. My thing is that most people make the choice to expose their own sexual orientation, which makes no sense to me. I would have never known that most people are gay if they didn't tell. I know that some people are open about their sexual orientation and I applaud their confidence in who they are. But, the people where no one knew before the fact and tell it would appear as if they are taking a risk and putting a target on their backs. As I stated before this should be a private matter. I get that you feel like you are not being real or true to yourself, but people do it all the time. EVERYONE acts different in public than what they do in the privacy of their own home. So why make the choice to tell it to the world and maybe subject yourself to harm? You should just live your life as you want and the best way to make sure you are happy and not everyone else. Just a thought. What do you think?

Do Blacks Really Commit More Crime?

I recently had a conversation with a friend about this subject and it really got me thinking. If you were to ask anyone in the United States this question they would say "yes" or "of course". And why wouldn't they? You see crimes committed by Blacks every where, on TV, the Internet, in newspapers, every where. So it would allow someone to think that Blacks are a race of criminals. Not only is it always in the media but some people would argue that statitics show that Blacks commit more crimes based on the prison population. That doesn't not mean they commit more crimes that may mean that the justice scales have been tipped not in their favor (Troy Davis). But, how can that be in a society where we are the minority? Let's say that White people are 80% (20 million) of the population and Black people are 12% (5 million) of the population. And statistics show that 40% of the Black population is in prison that is 2 million people and 40% sounds like a high number but it is only 10% of the White population. Although the percentage of criminals in the White population may be lower on paper but in reality they have a larger number of criminals, it is just because most of the time their crimes are not exposed unless it becomes too large to keep under a rug ( ex. Bernie Madoff, Jeffey Dahmer, Timothy McVey,and the list goes on).You have to be careful when dealing with numbers. Numbers can lie and numbers can be manipulated to anyone's benefit. We all know that every race has it's criminals it just seems that Black crimes are exposed more. Once I took the time to gather my thoughts, I had to ask myself...Do Blacks really commit more crimes? What do you think?

Racism: Alive and Well

Even with all the advances we have made as a country & society, racism is still alive and well, which doesn't make sense to me. Hasn't the United States come too far to still have these issues? A Black man is the leader of the free world and there are a lot of Black successful people who are doctors, lawyers, athletes & such, when less than 60 years ago Blacks were denied the opportunity to do these things. But if you watch the news or surf the net, you will know that racism is going on throughout this country. I see an incident at least once a week. Last week "The View" had an issue with racism. Sherri Shephard was upset with Barbara Walters when she said "niggercamp" which is the name associated with Rick Perry a GOP presidential candidate. Sherri's issue was the tone she said it (silly) and what it means vs. Whoopi, who said nigga (that's a whole other debate). Anyhow, I read today that there was sign at a Michigan State University that read "No niggers please" This is a place of higher education and shows that racism stems from anywhere. It is so sad to me that with all the devastation in this world, hurricane, genocide, tsunami's, wars; that hatred in ths country is something that may never be solved because as long as people are afraid of what is different they will continue to justify their actions. I am well aware that there are injustices and imbalances in this country but hatred is a choice just as love is a choice.

Friends with Benefits

I hear that term thrown around so much all the time these days. Not sure who came up with the concept but if I had to guess I would say a man lol! But exactly what are FWB and are you in one right now. My understanding is that you get all the "benefits" of a relationship with out actually being in a relationship or committed to that other person, no strings attached. I take it as you guys go out together, dinner, movies or etc. and "hook up" to have sex every now and again. In essence, isn't that what most people do when they first meet? There is not a commitment, you are getting to know each other a little more, sounds like dating to me. But everyone gets caught up in labels and titles. I guess if you start off as FWB then there are no expections to grow into a relationship with the other person, you can keep your options open, but isn't that like dating? I am not sure what the difference is, but it can be construed as the same thing. But here is one important factor to think about, if you have a FWB situation and you never go out and the only time he/she calls is to "hook up" then you are not in a FWB you are a booty call. I think in this day in age everyone has experienced this type if situation rather you admit it or not. I am not going to judge anyone, but if both parties are consenting to the situation then go for it. Unfortunately, over time I believe one of the parties feelings are going to get invested and they may want a relationship with this person. But, since the FWB status was established up front; can you ever get out of the "friend" zone and move towards a committed relationship; and my other question is do you still have a friendship when the "benefits" are gone? In a FWB situation are you REALLY friends or just a hollerback girl/guy? I don't know, share you thoughts....